Is My Ship Sinking? Really I need a break just for now!

Sorry I know it's suppose to be Weekend Wrap Wednesday but I'm a little swamped with a freak out! As everyone is aware the economy sucks and a lot of jobs are being cut. Well months ago I was cut to 32 hours which we made work, I took on another job working from home and just doing what I can to get by. Well after that people were laid off, others had their hours cut and it's just not a good time for the engineering field. Those of you that have read my blog or know me personally know I'm a HUGE worry wart!!! I also freak at every time a door is shut with the bosses. So when little things are said and I'm showing others things only I do, yup I freak out! So I'm not sure if it's coming or not but I'm preparing myself for the bad to come. The bottom of my world may fall out of and I could get laid off. So I guess I'll start preparing for it, I have a REALLY bad feeling that it will be my last day at the end of the month. So I'm so sorry everyone I haven't been around to comment back, I've been on the search and also going threw the closet to see what I can sell on craigslist! I'll try to be back on tomorrow and comment on all your post I've missed to get me up todate!


So if things can't get worse I had a thing with my mom. I really love my mom and she's a great person I know she's looking out for me but we have two different styles. I'm the soft mushy (yes my body too) person I really hate confrontation and yes the waterworks will come! Mom is very straight forward person says it like it is. So Cole went to private PreK last year mom paid for it we paid for the daycare. Rick and I talked it over and figured we wanted to get Cole into Kindergarten there also since he did so well with the one on one and teaching him about God really helped him. So we figured it was only a little more than the daycare we were paying there so we could wing it. Well I guess my mom got upset we didn't ask her if it was ok. She told me she thinks I secretly think she will pay for it. So not the case at all that is why I didn't mention it to her because we had it handled. I really hate borrowing money from my parents they really are great people but borrowing from them just turns into a big deal and it's better for all of us if it doesn't happen. I was very happy they OFFERED to pay for PreK last year but I wasn't going there this year. So I know mom is worried about us and how we'll pay for it especially if I get laid off but it's just one of those things I'm doing all I can to find another job if it comes to that and just put it in the Lords hands to take care of us.


So let's just say our conversation didn't turn out well I ended in tears and a BIG headache. Really I know she means well but really I just needed a hug and know that I'm making it work. Sometimes if feels like we'll always be the little child to our parents, but we also need to be adults too. One day I'll stop feeling like my parents always think I need or want something and just know I'm an adult that is doing my best. LOL you would think I always borrow money from them, really it's been years since I've asked to borrow. We've always made out deals where I work it off and when I say work I mean back breaking yard work. Oh boy to be the child, note to self learn and grow from our relationship.


So there it is my big freak out plus the I need a break moment! I'm hanging in there applying just in case. If anyone knows of an opening in Tacoma, WA send it my way :). But your prayers and good thoughts are always welcomed! I'll try to stop by tomorrow, sorry everyone! Off to the job boards! Muah!