Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Play Ground Smack Down

So this past weekend I took the kids to a play ground which lasted a total of 5 minutes! Yup that is right 5 minutes let me play those glorious 5 minutes for you. We drive around trying to find a spot after making 3 loops we find one, the whole time Cole is asking mom I want to go play. Ok not asking more like whining over and over again, but mom the toys are right there! Yes I KNOW COLE!!! We get out of the car play chicken with a few dozen cars trying to do the same loop we just did. In my head I'm going SUCKER, but of course I contain myself. We step onto the playground to find the mom pose turn and stare, really?? Why is when you go to a new place it's like your admittedly being judged? It's a flipping playground take your nosy butts and go back to watching your kids!

So of course Caden wants to walk, I ask Roy who didn't want to go on the toys. Mind you there is a sign that says made from age 5 to 12 years, he's only 11! Whatever! He wants to just stand there, ok fine can you watch Cole. Sure! We do a little trip walk back around to find Roy staring at the clouds. Where is Cole? Shrug, not even a word!!! WTF come on dude, one thing only one thing I asked you to do! So of course my heart dropped I couldn't find my little toe head in the sea of brown head kids. Really you think that he would be easy to find, but nope. I ran around carrying Caden and having a nervous break down. Finally I find him pure sweet running down my face, it's time to go home. Of course Cole has his own breakdown, Caden is freaking because he wants to run and walk. And until I can figure out that cloning thing, I just can't do it all since I guess keeping an eye on Cole was too much to ask. So that my friends was my 5 minute park smack down!

What you think I would leave you with that? LOL, of course this sarcastic mom of course was people watching and those same snooty moms I of course put in to categories like my moms at the daycare :).

The Clickity Clack Moms
The moms that always were the silly point shoes. Ok yes I'm jealous and I LOVE them but my rear can't keep upright on them. But still at the flippin' park in 6 inch high heel point toe shoes that clickity Clack on the pavement!

The Snooty Moms
You know the ones that sit there give all the other moms dirty looks, like she is above them all.

The book Moms
So like me bring a book and make the most of the little free time the get

The Nannies
Yup they are out there, nannies taking care of the kids while Clickity Mom is at the mall :).

Inappropriate Dressed Moms
The ones that have the girls hanging out and the muffin top hanging out. Yup she's a catch guys.

The Texter
She's so involved in her cell phone that her child actually fell off the monkey bars and another mom picked them up!

And my favorite Mr. Moms
Being raised by a single dad for a while these dads melt my heart. They are right there next to the monkey bars cheering on their kids. Yup they Rock

There were a few more but I think I'll save those for my next round. Have a wonderful day girls!

*Editor Note: I have some Kick Butt Readers that gave some to funny to not mention other plyaground moms that I missed over. Get me for writing at 10pm ... LOL Thanks girls, Big Hugs!


Thank You Chris O
The Khaki Moms
These are the overacheiving PTA moms who dress casual in their khaki's with full makeup and not a hair out of place. They ignore you when you show up for PTA meetings or other school functions. They drive SUV's not minivans and don't want your help at PTA commintees unless they hand pick you even tho you have lots of experience if they'd just find it worth it to talk to you.


Thank You Robin Costello (I don't know why I didn't mention these moms, same moms that are constanting talking and acting like the child runs them, yup that's going to be fun when they are teens)
Helicopter Moms
Those moms that hover over their child to make sure the swing doesn't go too high or hang on to them as they go down the slide

You Girls Rock!! Muah, if I forget any other please let me know, let's see how many we can add :)

14 comments:

  1. thnax for visiting my blog! hope your dont mind another follower... doncha just looove how those mom act as if its high school ALL over again! get a life i wanna scream... cant wait to read more from ya!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Im so the book mom. But I would notice if a kid fell off of something.

    um, maybe not if I were reading twilight

    ReplyDelete
  3. My personal favorite label is the khaki moms. These are the overacheiving PTA moms who dress casual in their khaki's with full makeup and not a hair out of place. They ignore you when you show up for PTA meetings or other school functions. They drive SUV's not minivans and don't want your help at PTA commintees unless they hand pick you even tho you have lots of experience if they'd just find it worth it to talk to you.

    My favorite ploy at school functions or the playground was to go up to a group of them and try and butt into their conversations. As they'd move away, I'd follow them around, interjecting random comments. After one such event, I ran into a group of them having dinner at a local restaurant. They moved tables as they thought me and my friends were too loud and drunk. (we weren't very drunk but we were loud!) Damn I can be annoying!

    yeah yeah Jesus is going to punish me for being so judgmental.

    ReplyDelete
  4. LoL! Love the categories for moms. You forgot the helicopter moms. Those moms that hover over their child to make sure the swing doesn't go too high or hang on to them as they go down the slide.

    5 minutes is 5 minutes, right?

    ReplyDelete
  5. I was the mom you left out, the one on the monkey bars with their kids, yep that was me, riding our bikes to the playground, running with them, and climbing on everything so that I could relive my childhood! It is what we have kids for an excuse to play and ride the rides at the theme parks, come on admit it guys!!! I would fight mine for the front seat!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Well I don't think I'm any of those moms (thankfully). I'm more like E in that I actually attend to my children while at the playground...maybe a little too much...that's it there ya go another mom category...the Over-Attentive Mom, yep that's me...my poor kids!

    ReplyDelete
  7. You girls crack me up!! I love them all! I so need to be that more active mom. You girls make me want to be a better mom :).

    ReplyDelete
  8. Hey Lady. Just stopping in to say Hi.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I am the super laid back but attentive mom. (I think.) I am the type that probably embarrasses the kidlets because I act goofy. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  10. lol. even the playground is not without its woes.

    ReplyDelete
  11. OMG I hate the MOM stare. It's like they are toooooo good for you to even breathe their air. The perfect yupsters with their gymboree clad kids and their gap clad selves and the PERFECT hair/nails/makeup combo. And cellulite? Pshh celleulite better not EVEN look twice at them.
    Great post Lex!

    Laura

    ReplyDelete
  12. I only go to parks full of passed out drunks. They don't judge me.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I am a helicopter book reading mom! Love this post! (I love you period!)

    My personal favorite on your list is muffin top mom! LOL! We have lots of those in southern AZ!

    ReplyDelete
  14. I am a helocopter book type mom. But I will strike up a conversation if I think the mom is approachable.

    ReplyDelete

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